Welcome! A few notes...

This is both a welcome note and more or less a goodbye note. I will no longer be updating this blog but if it's you're first time here I'd like to help guide you along the blog.

Helpful Posts on ETS Surgery:
ETS Surgery Side Effects
My Experience with ETS Surgery

I had ETS surgery when I was 19 and consider myself an expert on the results. My hands no longer sweat but if I had to make this choice again I would consider exhausting many other options first. My compensation sweating is a daily struggle.

A Few Posts on Depression and Self Exploration:
You Have to Believe That They are Wrong
The No BS Life
Happiness is Personal

The Story That Got Me Blogging:
Riding on the Metro

My #1 Resource for Hyperhidrosis:
SweatHelp.org

Sweaty Products
Below are a few links of products I use and full disclosure I receive a teenie tiny referral bonus from Amazon if you purchase. This isn't a big money maker for me but it might just help fund that next cup of coffee :).

Carpe - This is the only super strong antiperspirant that I've found that I can use on my body to help with ETS compensation sweat. I use it when I'm in a pinch because it can cause some irritation but overall I've been pretty impressed with this lotion. David from Carpe reached out in 2015 with samples and from the reviews on Amazon you can see it's already a hit. It's not a miracle lotion but it can help quite a bit.


Honey Soles - These fit in most shoes (not a pair of Toms or ballet flats) but I really love the way the cork helps wick away sweat. Feels really nice on my feet when I prefer not to wear socks.


Rainbow Hemp Sandals - The only sandals I don't slip and slide in.



Yoga Towels - Sweat all you want in yoga, these towels are my everything!



 -- Signing off for now. I hope you find some of this information helpful!

xoxo,
Sara

The No BS Life

I wrote the first draft of this post over a year ago. I've cleaned it up a bit but the post is very much a reflection of me in 2015; something I'm very proud of.

One of the best gifts I've ever received.

Begin:

The year of no BS.

I've been avoiding this post. It means so much to me that I couldn't even fathom where to begin.

It's July. Oh wait, no it's definitely August. I've been living the year of no bullshit since about December 2014. I can't pin point where it began but I began to say, "Year of no bullshit!"

I turned 29 last month, I've gone through my entire life up until this point very wrapped up in what others thought of me. How I was perceived. How I could control those perceptions. Then I had a major break through with my therapist -- I've spent most of my life controlling my mother's environment to make her happy that our relationship became too codependent and it was spilling into other aspects of my life. My relationship with my mother was suffering because of this. I was trying to control the uncontrollable. 

So I'm working to let that go. I can only control myself. I can only make myself happy.

This blog was a major stepping stone for me as well. Here I am forced to live in truth. You want to hear my struggles and you don't care that I'm sweating through it all. Together we're open and honest. For so long I was used to hiding having hyperhidrosis - making it only worse - and now I admit it fairly openly. The sweating will never go away but I'm far more comfortable in it and as a result I sweat a bit less. 

If you're familiar with comedian Pete Holmes he's a great example of living in truth. His podcast You Made It Weird became an outlet for him to talk about all his weird shit. Also an outlet for me to get some solid laughs as well as have 'holy shit' moments. We all have weird shit! He's a sweaty dude too. He doesn't fall in the hyperhidrosis category as far as I can tell but hey he's talking about being sweaty openly! He's a big ol soggy man sometimes. He talks about his divorce. His "JDates". Plenty of other quirky stuff. Thanks Petey boy! I'm a huge fan. 

Living the year of no bullshit has brought me so much joy. One of the biggest joys, excuse me while I tear up, is connecting with Daniel. My sweet pea, Daniel. We met through mutual friends (it's a way cuter story than that but only so much at once). Our first date, that I initiated mind you, started exactly like this:

We exchange greetings.

Sit down on bar stools.

Daniel blurts, "I want you to know I have no filter."

Amazed I say, "Well this is the year of no bullshit for me."

From that day forward we've held true to those statements. We've been dating, with highs and lows (no bs!), for almost seven months now. This being my longest relationship, Daniel has been very patient as I navigate being vulnerable and letting someone into my world. I had worked so hard recently to be happy alone, I truly was happy alone, it was hard to move into this new territory that was foreign to me.

The greatest aspect of our relationship is knowing we are not dependent on one another to make ourselves happy. I can only control myself. I can only make myself happy. With that obligation removed there is a divine levity to the relationship that makes spending time together so special. 

Daniel has taken it upon himself to find this blog. My heart jumped when I realized he took the time to find it. Google search must be doing the blog good! He's read about my past. There is no escaping my truth. (xoxo).

End.

p.s.

Daniel and I are still happily in love, best friends, roommates and continue to navigate the no bs life. It's funny to read about Pete Holmes because the topics he focuses on has evolved as well and I'm enjoying the progression of his "truthiness" life and his living/growing relationship with Sweet Val (his girlfriend/partner/best friend). 

You know what held me back from posting this for so long? I was waiting for the perfect picture to accompany it. I got the photo MONTHS ago but the post then got away from me. Anyone reading/read Elizabeth Gilbert's Big Magic? I'm in the thick of that book now and it's a wonderful exploration of creativity. She describes that creativity has the ability to move through you and away from you to find another outlet to let that creativity be born. In a way my creativity and spirit for this blog left me, and for now it's back so I'm harnessing it. I have one more good post in me coming up...

Crying Over Sweat Stains. It Still Happens.

I've been in a sad space for the last few days. I can't quite explain it, and not being able to explain it just perpetuates my sadness. AWESOME. 

Just moments ago I returned home and noticed the sweat stains all over my shirt. Pit stains. Torso stains. Back stains. 

Sadness flooded in like... I don't know what I'm so upset! I don't weep at every sweat stain. It's part of my identity at this point. I manage it. More times than not I am so used to being a sweaty person it doesn't phase me. If you've read other posts I think that's very clear.  

Then there are moments I can't help but feel so disgusting. I think why can't I just go for a walk without dripping through my clothes. My hands no longer sweat thanks to ETS surgery but my body melts down with any kind of physical exertion. I'm a healthy, active person and there is no reason I should be breaking this big of a sweat. Right now I'm crying over sweat. I feel exhausted. For those of you dealing with real problems, my sincere apologies. I'm over me too right now.

I watched Inside Out today. There's a wonderful lesson about sadness. Yadda yadda. Go see it. I won't spoil it for you. I had a rather lovely afternoon. 

I may not understand this sadness right now. Hopefully it will pass soon. It's a hell of a good reminder to book a therapy session because you can be doing just fine and get hit with an emotion like a sack of potatoes and feel like a sack of potatoes for no good reason. Well there are reasons but it doesn't totally make sense to me. 

I texted a few girlfriends this morning about the off feeling. One was feeling it too. Just yesterday I opened up to other friends for their opinion on my state of mind. One of the gals was dealing with something challenging as well. I had the comfort of knowing that I wasn't alone in navigating emotions. 

Emotions are fucked. Sweating is fucked. But it'll all be OK. I promise me and you that. Also, talk about the bad openly and others will open up too. You're not conditioned to be perfect. A friend once sent me a card that said, "Thank you for sharing your humanity." By sharing I find others give a little too. So I encourage you to try it. Share your true self -- sadness and all. 

Now that I've shared this with you I'm starting to feel a bit better already. Cheers. 

Calendaring Time for Us

I don't want to acknowledge it. I always acknowledge it and make false promises. Does it matter? OK. I've been gone. It's been just over a year since I've updated the blog.

Can we ignore that? Pick up like old friends?

View from my new apartment.
3 different apartments and 4 new jobs since moving to LA.

It's so good to see you. Did I tell you I started a new job? No, not that last one I told you about. Another one. The end of June will be my one year with the company. This is my fifth new job in seven years. I have a knack for landing jobs and it not being the right fit for the long run. This one though, we're going steady. A real keeper. A job that involves annual reviews, goals and a work culture that says 'we are here to get shit done'.

This new job has gotten between you and me. It doesn't like me focusing my efforts on personal projects while in the office. Those old gigs I had didn't care to notice that I was blogging here and there in between tasks. It's truly a blessing and a curse. I don't even think about blogging while on the job. The work culture is that good.

With each passing month it became harder and harder to even peak at the Sweat Through It email account. I cringed to think of how many people were waiting for responses. Waiting for questions to be answered. It was me, not you.

Advocating for the sweaty isn't my only interest. My brain is bubbling with ideas of creative pursuits (in large part thanks to Instagram, I refuse to use Pinterest). I want to sew more. The apartment I just moved into (woot!) desperately needs a dining table and I of course have been stuck on the idea of sourcing it from a vintage shop. My time working for a toy company made me realize, hey! maybe I could be a writer for children's TV or literature. Each weekday I come home and watch The Chew and have to text my friends about the decadent dishes we just have to make for our next picnic/dinner party/group vacation. On Tuesdays I never miss my hot yoga sculpt class (it's even marked on my work calendar) and push myself to make it to two more yoga classes during the week. OMG I desperately need to dust my entire apartment... be right back.

Breathe.

My desires are overflowing. My cup is not only half full it is flooding my kitchen and I'm so shocked I just stand in a puddle not sure where to begin. Expectations I've put on myself have essentially paralyzed me.

What do you want to get working on that just can't seem to find the room for?

It's OK to not have it all. To not have the energy to do everything and put on a happy face for the internet. I do want to do this though. I want to continue to connect with you.

Catch up again soon? I've pencilled you in for next week. Can't wait!

Happiness Is Personal

Another one bites the dust. I say that partially in jest, partially in frustration. The latest fella I was dating called things off last week. My heart is torn because I know it's for the better but I grew quite fond of him. I approached dating him differently than I had with any other guy. I had fun. I didn't put high stakes on things.

I've been watching a lot of Bob's Burgers lately. 

He hasn't processed his last breakup. A year or so relationship. They lived together for part of that time. Knowing this, I moved very cautiously. Red flags went a blazing when he added me on Instagram and there were very recent photos of them together. One was even captioned, "Best girlfriend ever." I approached it calmly, and asked for him to give me a bit of context. But before I texted him I had a good ten minutes of freaking out and emergency trip to the bathroom because my insides went haywire. He is not aware of said freak out. Social media has a way of throwing wrenches in perception. I recommend avoiding all adding/friending until once you're comfortable together.

After I heard his side of the breakup it was clear the relationship's end was a long time coming. I mean the woman moved out. That's not the most convenient thing to do. I pried a bit to see if he had some time to heal. To be sad. To wallow a bit. To realize he's still a whole without her. It seemed like he had moved on. He even took down the photo that threw me for a loop. I felt good but still weary. 

When he sent the initial text to say he needed to stop seeing me it didn't come as a surprise. Regardless, it is a bummer. That said, my level of respect for him has gone through the roof. His ability to admit he feels broken, and doesn't want to drag me through his road to recovery makes me warm inside. I want to shower him with love because he has done the right thing. Unfortunately, the right thing for me to do is to give him space. My ego smiled when he said I was something special. 

We had a very open and honest conversation over the phone a few hours after the initial text. It was strange because I didn't start sweating during the call like I normally do when on the phone. I care for him and I was able to share with him how I've worked through depression. Human to human I understood where he was coming from. As we spoke it was clear we have a real connection. Unlike Hansel who wasn't ready to love nor receive love, this man is very loving. He is a breath of fresh air. Except, despite how hard he tried, he couldn't open up to receive my affection.

A sense of hope comes over me dreaming of the day that he might call, text, or email to say he's ready. The door isn't closed but I do feel foolish holding that door open. We agreed I wouldn't wait for him but I can't say I'll be jumping into anything soon. I need a break from dating. If someone crosses my path I'll trust my judgement to know if it's right. God knows I've learned enough lessons in dating in the past few years. With each lesson I better be closer to the right partner. I have to trust that I am or I will go crazy. 

I'm not in pieces. On Friday night after a few drinks and a fun night with friends I cried on the drive home. Bourbon has a way of bringing out pain. I also made a killer playlist on Spotify that I'm still impressed with sober. Luckily those are the only tears I've shed.  I'm in a place where I'm capable of letting someone in. I've matured in the way I approach dating, and I'm comfortable with who I am. In a relationship or not I am a bad ass independent human being. He's not right now. There's no reason to be in tears. But how many more lessons do I have to learn? My patience level is waning. Then I read an article like this one that reminds me I have many years ahead. 

I read Maria's beautiful post that touches on being alone and embracing independence. Maria is a fellow sweater, she's one of us. I encourage you to read her work. Maria's words remind me it's a personal journey to happiness. You can't force anyone to get there. It has to be on their own accord. I've done that, and hopefully Michael can get there too.   

In good news, I'll get back to more sweaty related posts soon. A wonderful sweat free Renn Faire trip is worth sharing, and the very sweaty lunch I had when I learned my boss was putting in her two weeks.

Let's be in touch.

I Don't Like Feet

"I don't like feet," is a lie I've become committed to. It's the excuse I give to wearing closed toe shoes and socks year-round, declining pedicures, and avoiding all foot touching from massages to playful tickling. 

My sock game. Wild.

Why do people like to touch feet?!

New fella I'm seeing went to grab my feet on our date this weekend. I had socks on but they were most definitely sweaty. I didn't know if the sweat had permeated through the cotton. It seemed a little early to reveal my sweaty feet. I didn't drop the HH bomb. 

I was kicking myself for not opening the sliding door adjacent to his couch. There was a cool breeze that night. Instead we cuddled up on his leather couch. I most definitely began to sweat because how can you not sweat on leather? I steadily became more uncomfortable as the night went on. I could not keep my cool-- all senses of the word.

Why do people like leather couches?!

When he grabbed at my feet I flinched and pulled away immediately. "I don't like feet," I said it a few times like a nervous tick. My confidence was plummeting. He laughed and asked if I had scary feet. Well, honestly, in my humble opinion I do. I did not admit that though, because they don't look scary they just have some fucked up qualities. He laughed saying that he was now afraid to see my feet. I laughed back but really I just wanted to run to his fridge and cool off and die a little inside. 

Luckily I did ask to open the sliding door later in the night. I was immediately freezing due to the sweat all over my body. It was a better alternative though and kept my sweating at bay. He didn't once comment on my dampness. Could he feel it? Were his hands clammy enough he didn't feel the sweat?

I've told you to "Speak up. It's OK." Shame on me for not heeding my own advice. Sliding door open, please!

Go Ahead, Use Your Hands: A Review of The Boiling Crab

Busy. Busy. Busy. Do not slow down. Do not stop to think about life and decisions made. Nope. Nope. Nope.

This weekend was jam packed with activities to block my mind from coming close to thinking about the breakup. One fabulous activity I'm dying to share with you was eating at The Boiling Crab.

Yes, an eating activity. That's what I want to share most. Not the challenging hike I went on that took us on an unconventional trail. Not the amazing cocktail concoctions my friend came up with (elderflower liquor makes everything better by the way). 

Look at how much fun we're having!

The main menu draw at The Boiling Crab is ordering and raveging shellfish by the pound and you have a choice of seasonings. We went for "the whole shebang" which means they load it up with all the flavorings. Then choose your spice level. Mild please! 

The best part of eating at The Boiling Crab is you get to use your hands! I immediately thought of you my sweaty palm people. 

Out comes a plastic bag with your meal. That liquid is most definitely butter. Dive right in with your hands. Sweaty hands be damn. Hands that don't stop sweating is for once of no concern. Let your hands have some fun. Live it up having no restriction to interact with your food and share with your friends. 

I've never shelled sea creatures before. The staff was really helpful demonstrating. So pleased with our meal. Cooked and seasoned to perfection. The sausage, corn, and potatoes were also phenomenal. The cajun fries didn't wow me. I don't recommend the ranch dressing unless you're a fan of the bottle kind.

When visiting the Koreatown location keep in mind that the hour on weekends is about two hours. TWO hours. Good news is one of my favorite bars HMS Bounty is around the corner. With $7.50 premium cocktails (cheap by LA standards) we had a good time passing the time. Our bellies were primed and ready for a seafood adventure. 

Have a place like this in your town? Share in the comments. 

My Big Secret Revealed

I did it. I finally did it. I told manfriend that I have hyperhidrosis. I'm hesitant to write this post since I also told him about the blog. If he's curious and does some basic web research he'll find me here. If you're reading this manfriend, hello, welcome to the blog. Don't worry, I will never use your real name. 

For sake of the blog being reader friendly I'll refer to manfriend as Hansel. 

Twice now I've thought about telling him about HH. For whatever reason it didn't feel quite right. Saturday night a combination of feeling secure in where we are in our relationship and wanting to open up to him made for the right HH bomb dropping conditions. There we were laying in bed having a nice time chatting. I was comfortable in his arms staring up to the ceiling when I said, "So I have something to share. I have hyperhidrosis. That's why I sweat so much." I went on to add that I've had ETS surgery and provided a quick summary of side effects I still suffer from.

This is how you should always picture us.
Moderately famous and good looking.

His response was not what I was expecting. He joked calling me a monster and told me to leave in his playful way. I was in no way offended by this but it wasn't the response I expected nor wanted. He was ready to move on to the next topic.

Wait wait wait just a hot strudel minute there my handsome Hansel. I'm not ready to move on to the next topic. I just told you my most crippling secret. LETS TALK ABOUT THIS. Instead of saying that I turned to my side and became very internal. My mind was running and I couldn't vocalize what I was feeling. A wave of emotion took over to the point where if I looked at him I was afraid I would start to cry.

He asked if I wanted to be left alone so that I could sleep. Hansel sincerely thought I was ready for slumber not that I was riding an emotional roller coaster. I mustered up some confidence to say that I was feeling shy and frankly weird after telling him. 

Then in a tender but very frank way he said, "Nothing has changed. You've told me before that you get sweaty. You're a sweaty girl. So now I know there is a name for it."

There you have it. Nothing has changed. The reveal that I was so ashamed of was simply a sharing moment. As it should be. 

Until of course summer rolls around and I don't want him to touch me because I'm most likely damp through my clothes. Ah! One step at a time though.

How have you told someone about HH? How did they react? 

My Boss Calls Me Snowflake

How do you deal with hyperhidrosis? There is no quick cure despite what Twitter spammers might claim. For every solution there seems to be a side effect. I had surgery but I still sweat uncontrollably. I can't control or manage my sweat as easy as I'd like, but I can take ownership and responsibility in making my environment comfortable.

My boss started calling me Snowflake. The main reason being I'm constantly seeking shade when we're out and about. 

Snowflake originated when my boss decided she wanted to pick up a HoneyBaked Ham the day before Thanksgiving this last November. I tagged along for the journey. For my American readers, have you tried to get a Honey Baked Ham before Thanksgiving or Christmas? It's pure madness. It's as if we are required to have succulent ham for the holidays. I suppose we are, but my goodness.

HoneyBaked Ham, where you can work on your sun tan.

So there we were standing in a long line. Of course the sun was beaming bright. I think I recall it being around 75. That damn sun was piercing the line with its deathly rays. I felt droplets of sweat forming. The feeling is a familiar one. It's a feeling that I know if it continues will lead to a sweat-stain-embarrassing-disaster.

To my boss I said, "I'm sweating. This sun. I don't know if I can take it."

My boss, "Here stay in the shade. Stay as long as you can." The shade was a small sliver of cool created by a pillar. The shade lasted only moments.

Then my boss suggested, "Go in the liquor store. Go cool off Snowflake. I don't want you to melt."
And that's when Snowflake was born. I'm never ashamed to request the seat in the shade, or request some ice water. "Snowflake, are you melting?," is a comforting phrase.

My coworkers have no clue I suffer from a specific condition called hyperhidrosis, but they know I sweat and that I "melt". They know I get uncomfortable. They're also awesome for accommodating to my sweaty needs.

If you own it, you might just get an awesome nickname out of it.

xoxo,
Snowflake

Manduka eKO Yoga Mat Review for Sweaty Feet

When I was a kid and it was time for Christmas wish lists I was notorious for detailed instructions. I provided envelopes to each family member that included clippings from newspaper ads. Working in marketing now I see that I was an advertisers dream come true. I was damn fortunate to have such an obliging family. 

Now it's not so cute or funny to provide such lists. Also, I need practical things. Like a $100 yoga mat from Manduka. 

I know. It's outrageous.

It was the only item on my list though... OK and my expensive Vitamin C daily moisturizer by Murad (it's amazing). I urged my family that if they felt inclined to provide anything else it must be either practical (toilet paper) or cash (no Starbucks gift cards). I would like to trade the rolling pin I got for some Windex. Oh well. You can't have it all.

After years of yoga and four mats that merely get the job done I have graduated to a mat that will hopefully last me a lifetime.

The Details
eKO Mat 71"
Color: "Swoon 2-tone" no longer available online.
The color is bright and I adore it. 

Let's take a moment.

Can you sweat on it?
Yes. A thousand times yes.

Will I slip on it?
Not nearly as much as a regular mat you might pick up at Target. I would still recommend bringing a towel to class.

I normally always use a towel on my mat. The other day in hot yoga with sweat pouring, my feet little rivers of sweat, I pulled the towel back and put my foot directly to the mat. I did not slip or slide at all. Warrior II, no problem. Crescent lunge, I got this.

It was an awesome experience to feel the mat during standing poses. The tactile sensation of my yoga mat gripping to my moves was so satisfying. eKO and I had a moment. 

Doing a down dog was another issue though. My hands no longer sweat but my hands still get damp from my arms and the condensation in the room. I began to slide a little bit to the point where I had to pull the towel forward.

At the end of the day you still need a towel. But, you can pull the towel back and have the exhilarating feeling of not slipping during certain poses. 

Crescent lunge and this lady is not slipping!
By the redness of my feet you know they were sweaty little dogs.

Things you should know:
1) It smells. I opened the packaging and it smelled like manure. Yes, that means it smelled like shit. The rubber is just potent. I urge Manduka to give their mats a good wash before putting them on the market. I've aired the mat out for a few weeks now and it still reeks. It's a little distracting during savasana.

2) It's heavy. I'm fine with that but don't plan on traveling with this mat.

Should I buy this mat?
If you are a seasoned yogi and looking to treat yourself then absolutely you should buy this mat. If you are just getting into yoga and you want to see if it's for you then I don't recommend. Also, if you're a yogi on-the-go you might want to consider one of their lighter mats.

What other products can help my yoga experience?
Did I mention that I am not being paid to write this? Because I'm not. I'm a Manduka fan gal. 
If you have some money to throw around, I also love Manduka's towels. They're similar to towels you can take camping or a thin ShamWow. If you don't want to splurge find a low ply towel. Not your fancy fluffy towels. You want something you can easily move on. A beach towel is your best bet. I personally also hate a towel that is too soft, the texture on my sweaty feet makes me squirm. 

Pantiliners for Sweaty Armpits

'Tis the season to fret over which dresses will and won't show pit stains. Last winter I spotted a simple yet beautiful royal blue sheath dress on sale. Pat on the back for my cost savings but immediate face palm for not knowing if this dress would show sweat. 

Classy for the holidays

Just look at that gorgeous color! How could I resist? I went all year without wearing the beaut. It wasn't until I threw my Third Annual Holiday Crock Pot Party that I had an excuse to wear it.

Yes, Crock Pot Party is exactly what you think it is. I invite a bunch of friends, they bring Crock Pots full of delicious food, there is one Crock Pot for hot cider, we drink, we are merry, and we have a fucking ball. This one was by far my favorite Crock Pot Party. 

Man friend not pictured. 

Leading up to the party I did no sweat prep. I didn't look to see if I had clean stockings without holes, I didn't see if I had a clean slip dress to wear under, and I didn't test the fabric to see how much sweat it could hold before a stain showed. Call me a wild woman.

I did go to hot yoga the morning of the party. This helps ensure I don't sweat for a few hours after. My nerves chill out a bit. 

30 minutes before getting dressed memories of past parties slapped me hard. I was reminded that it gets hot in a house filled with people, when I drink I sweat, and I start to sweat more when interacting with people I haven't seen in a while. HOLY SLOW COOKED MEATBALL WHY DIDN'T I PREPARE?

I called out to my roommate, "Laila! Can you come help me for a moment?" Her boyfriend was in the house so I couldn't quite request what I wanted. "Do you have pantiliners? I want to use them for the pits of my dress." Every so helpful she said, "Yes! And good idea!" No shame in asking.

Not just for your underwear.

I recommend buying a thicker liner. Liners that err on the side of a pad. Do not go cheap on this folks. Cheap liners will crumple up, not stick very well, and ultimately fall on the ground in front of the person you're talking to. I went with the store brand version of Always Xtra Protection line. Look for the purple box in the US. International readers if you have an equivalent let us know in the comments. 

The liners worked but not as well as I hoped. It hedged some sweating but not completely. I could've put new liners in midway through the party and that would've done the trick. 

Through the night I had no major sweat panics. Except for one brief moment. Man friend and I were walking outside when he leaned in to tell me, "There is a stain on your back." I FREAKED OUT internally. I slyly walked through the party trying not to show my back.

Was it a period stain? A sweat stain? I was feeling dewey all over. Oh my god I have a huge sweat stain on my back.

I go to my bathroom to see a small white spot of powdered sugar. I didn't even bother wiping it off. I marched outside and informed man friend that he gave me an unnecessary heart attack and to NEVER do that again.

It's reported to be 81 degrees in LA on Christmas. Bah humbug. 

Disney's Frozen for the Sweaty

It's screener season in Los Angeles. Friends and bosses of friends start receiving films in the mail to consider for awards season. It's a beautiful thing to watch new releases for free from the comfort of your own space. 

Last night the man friend and I watched Frozen at my request. I highly recommend this film to anyone with a soul. I'll warn the music isn't up to Disney classic standards. That said, I loved this film. My HH friends you will relate to this film.

Girl, I know that look.

I choked up when Elsa has her coronation to be queen. She wears gloves to mask her magical powers that torment her. Her hands tremble as she faces the crowd on what's supposed to be a joyous occasion. The anguish that almost paralyzes her is something we can all relate to with HH. How closely the story is tied to her hands is really something sweet for us. 

Also, Olaf is now one of my new favorite Disney characters. He gave me some hearty belly laughs. Thanks, Olaf you're the best. All things cheesy and delightful bring them my way.

More Olaf!

Although I was pumped to watch the film I wasn't the most relaxed to start. It was my last date night for a long while with man friend. We were a little frantic getting together since he completely forgot the actual date he was flying home for Christmas. He had planned for another day in LA while his plane ticket did not. So I rushed home and packed a bag to stay the night. 

I forgot to pack socks. Such an amateur move. How did I forget to pack SOCKS?! I threw on my lounge clothes and a pair of slip on shoes. It should be burned in my memory that when I lounge around I need to wear socks. This isn't a new revelation. I cannot have my feet dangling free. 

To top it off it was hot in his apartment. I immediately questioned if the heater was on. It was not. I then asked if we could open the door to let in fresh air. Fresh air was not making its way in quickly enough. Feet were dripping wet. I sat with my legs crossed hoping my pants would mop up the sweat. I became uncomfortable. I flopped around trying to find the perfect sweat wicking position. He was none the wiser of my droplets but I feared him finding out.

My body must have been radiating heat because asked if he should open a window. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES. There was a nice cross breeze that moved through the stuffy apartment. Finally, I was able to kick my legs out across the couch and focus on the film. My sweating subsided. They were still clammy but they were manageable and less embarrassing. 

When we started chatting after the film the sweating started up again. A fun reminder that I can't always have complete control. I had a similar takeaway from watching Frozen.

I'm planning to have "SOCKS" tattooed on my arm real soon. 

Tumblr, Baking Soda Remedy, & Labeling

If you haven't ventured into the Tumblr world I encourage you to go dabble. Dip your toe in. Start with a quick "hyperhidrosis" tag search. You'll find a plethora of young users reaching out for help or at least a little understanding and acceptance. It's quite magical. I thank the powers that be everyday that I didn't have social media in high school BUT this is kind of awesome.

Here's a message you might find interesting I received on Tumblr:

Wow it just occurred to me to look for a hyperhydrosis tag on Tumblr and found your blog :) It's so nice to see that I'm not alone with this shit (which for me is a curse mostly because of social expectations about 'hygiene' and people assuming sweating means I'm nervous...).  

Anyway, two things that are in my mind:   

1) After experimenting with lots of kinds of deodorants a few years ago I found that putting Soda Bicarbonate powder on my armpits totally vanishes any sweat odor. It works wonders for me.

via Etsy

This is great to hear! I've never attempted to use Soda Bicarbonate or baking soda. I used it recently with my shingles disaster and it worked wonders to relieve itching. Hoorah for a natural remedy and not to mention dirt cheap. All deodorants have curbed my odor in my armpits. However baking soda might be something to consider for my groin (smelly hoohah, ugh), and perhaps my feet. 

Quick Baking Soda Remedies

2) Would you (or your followers) consider hyperhidrosis a disability? Because in a social context it does mean a lot of handicap and embarrassment, also makes some everyday activities more difficult or dangerous to do (eg. handling knives). I'm curious about the views of other people living with this condition.

What are your thoughts? We want to hear from you.

We all agree hyperhidrosis can be crippling. There are examples of people unable to perform their job due to hyperhidrosis who were then able to collect disability insurance. I know this to be true because I was denied disability insurance after having ETS surgery because of said examples. That's a post for another day.

My personal opinion, please by all means disagree in the comments, is if we consider hyperhidrosis a disability we're doing ourselves a disservice. We a creating a crutch for sufferers to fall on instead of empowering each other. We are fully capable of taking care of ourselves with HH. My daily functions are not put to a halt because of HH. They might be compromised. That said, I don't think we can fall in the ranks of those who need special assistance to get by. 

Instead of drawing attention to hyperhidrosis as a disability I would rather we draw attention to HH in general. Educating teachers, doctors, and employers that someone with HH is not excessively sweating because they're nervous or have poor hygiene we're simply being.

What do you have to say?

Why Mention Hyperhidrosis on Your Online Dating Profile?

For better or worse my dating life is fueled by the internet. Seriously, what is wrong with people? Does no one in Los Angeles ask people out anymore? Wait a second. What's wrong with me? Before I tumble down that rabbit hole I want to talk about writing online dating profiles.

Even Martha is cool with online dating.

Out of pure curiosity I searched "Hyperhidrosis" on OKCupid. There weren't many profiles that mentioned it but I was a little dismayed by the ones that did. I so desperately wanted to reach out and say, "STOP. Take that off immediately!" 

I refrained as I'm not expert. Although, I have had two relationships develop from online dating and a sleuth of first and second dates. I've been around the internet block.

Always ask yourself, what would Martha do?

To Mention or Not to Mention HH?

Pro

You're being your true authentic self. While writing the perfect profile you are compelled to mention that you suffer from hyperhidrosis. Perhaps within the narrative about yourself it organically comes out. The reader has learned a new fact about you. They know what they're getting into.

Pro

You might find another person with hyperhidrosis who matches your personality. You understand each other on a sweaty level. When you go to the movies together you sit in peace knowing the other won't go for a hand grab.

Con

You sound guarded. By mentioning "my hands sweat profusely" it really reads, "I told you that I sweat. You can't judge me. You know exactly what you're signing up for." Sorry dude, you sound like you have some emotional walls to tear down and I don't know if I'm willing to help with that. 

Con

Are you over sharing? Did you mention hyperhidrosis AND how awful it can be when your underwear is soggy from merely walking around the mall? I've just blocked your profile. Everyone, no really everyone, has something their insecure about. It doesn't need to be the first thing out of our mouths.  

Con

You might find another person with hyperhidrosis who doesn't match your personality. Just because someone has hyperhidrosis doesn't mean they're your match. Hyperhidrosis has shaped my existence but I am not defined by HH. We all have values, interests, and aspirations in life. Explore those first to see if your partner is a match. 

Would I ever mention HH in my own profile? No. 

Resources for crafting an online profile:

7 tips to create an online dating profile that works
6 Online Dating Mistakes to Avoid
How To Write a Good Online Profile

I'm Hot and Uncomfortable

I started seeing someone. It feels weird to say that as we've only been on a handful of dates. "Seeing someone" sounds serious, but there is really no other way to describe what we're doing. We are seeing each other.

Now that I've written this it will fall apart quickly.

From what I can tell he's a good guy that has my sense of humor. I get a sense that I can talk to him about my hyperhidrosis when the time is right. We'll see where things go. 

I had a big confidence break through with him last night. We were in the throws of making out when I became way too hot [insert tasteless joke]. My body was becoming damp and his hands were all over me. He was more or less mopping up my perspiration with his hands. I wonder what he thought of it. I'll never know. I did know though that if we had continued for much longer beads of sweat would have trickled down. The fear of splashes on his hands came over me. 

I must not let that happen. Just yet.

I took control of the situation though. I pulled away subtly, smiled, fanned myself and said, "Hey. I'm really warm, a little sweaty, and kind of uncomfortable. I think I've hit my limit for the night." We starred at each other for a moment. "Sorry, I'm just uncomfortable. Not because of you though. I'm just warm." We starred some more. There was no judgement in his eyes thank god. 

I then diverted the conversation to when we'd see each other next. Everything was peachy king. I did not begin to sweat more out of fear. I didn't panic because I felt bad about stopping the smooches. It was what it was. I went from uncomfortable to comfortable. 

Speak up. It's OK.

Thanks Nick from New Girl for helping me tell this tale.

Goodbye Summer, You Weren't So Bad

Fall is upon us. I can hardly get out of bed in the morning, after all the sun is not even ready for the day at 6:30 am. It's near impossible to emerge from my cozy covers when it's pitch black out. As I drifted off to bed last night without sweaty feet I realized it's been a while since I had to put on socks at bed time to soak up the dampness. It was truly a mild summer.

Look at that nerd geeking out over Chardonnay at the beach in November. 

Was it a mild summer or was I just boring? I played it safe this year. I avoided bars and drank cooler beverages. My social life was filled with familiar faces and places avoiding unexpected scenarios. I went to the beach only once, and I sought out shade whenever possible. Is this what growing up is like? Making a concious effort to make sure I'm comfortable? Maybe.

If You Get Caught In A Heat Wave - Sara's Adult Minded Tips (Even If It Is a Bit Too Late)

1. Stay in the shade. 

Don't worry about getting a tan. You're only going to get wrinkles, sun damage, and a sweat stain out of it. Tell the sun to take a hike.  

2. Drink ice water. 

This one you've heard before but it really does help keep your insides cool and our fucked up internal thermostats in check.  

3. Avoid hard liquor. 

Getting drunk really quick is fun when you're 19, pounding shots of flavored vodka to get the courage to dance on tables. Then you wake up the next morning and see your pit stains tagged all over Facebook. Drink slow and drink less hard liquor so that you wake up worry free. 

An almanac could tell me the highs and lows of Los Angeles. But who has time for that?! I'll say the sun scorched a little less leaving me a touch more dry, AND I took extra caution to manage my sweat. A splendid combination. 

Although I am embracing my favorite time of year with a full heart I can't say that summer was all that awful. I could use another beach day. 

How did everyone else cope with summer? Confidence peaking with cool breezes?

Cate Blanchett's Superb Sweaty Performance

Actors are beautiful. A great majority of them. They exude grace and beauty that can stop you dead in your tracks. Living in LA it's happened to me. Even actors that are not the typical definition of beautiful tend to have something about them. Louis CK being a prime example. 

Woody. A total boss.

Over the weekend I caught Blue Jasmine the latest Woody Allen film. Cate Blanchett despite playing an unhinged whack-a-doo she is gorgeous in this film. I know by industry standards she is respected as a beautiful talented woman, but she wasn't on my radar much. She was just there floating around aimlessly in my memory bank labeled as "that one actress who's been in that one film." Until I saw Blue Jasmine.

Woody Allen has made some of my favorite films including Annie Hall (complexities of relationships) and Match Point (sexy suspenseful drama). The man writes and directs a damn good script. His directing style appears effortlessly distinctive and recognizable across all genres of film. The dialogue he writes for Blue Jasmine reminds me how clever Woody is. He creates an environment that engrosses you where you can't stop talking about it hours after the film. Woody, you're fabulous.

Cate's performance as Jasmine is phenomenal. Beyond her beauty I wanted to share that she sweats in Blue Jasmine! Go get your ticket now. I perk up anytime I see any sort of pit stain on screen. 

Girl, you lookin' damp.

The downside is the wet rings under her arms are from pure anxiety and Xanax induced side effects. She's not one of us. Regardless I appreciate Woody including this as part of her character. I would be interested to see how it's denoted in the script.  Jasmine's emotional breakdown is a full body experience. Watching a beautiful woman sweat through an expensive silk dress makes me smile. I've been there. Although my dress was probably polyester. And depending on how you look at it you might be comforted by Jasmine, "Well at least when I sweat through my dress I wasn't a complete train wreck."

Keep sweatin' Hollywood. 

Your Friend's Coworker Probably Has Hyperhidrosis

My new apartment has no cable nor a working television. Being deprived of basic entertainment has translated to long conversations with my roommates on our uncomfortable couch. You know, talking and catching up. Just enjoying each others conversation. I'm not a chatty person so I'd prefer to feast on Bravo reality but I'll adjust. 

Living with three girls is like an SNL skit sometimes

Last night after yoga feeling sweat free I sat with one of the roomies. Not only was I not sweating but I didn't need to wear socks. When it was clear we were going to hang out I scurried to my room to find a pair of socks. There wasn't a pair handy. Ruffling my bed I hoped a pair might fall out. No stray socks to be found. I walked back out to the living room in a daringly without socks. 

After yoga I generally have about an hour window or more where I don't sweat. My body must be so tapped out of sweating that it needs a break. Read more about my yoga recommendations. 

Back to the point. Roomie and I got to talking about our health issues. Turns out I had never told her about my hyperhidrosis. Like everyone else I've told she had no idea and never noticed. We worked together for about a year. She saw me five days a week. How could she have not smelled my sweaty self on those days that the air conditioning broke in our office?

We continued to swap insecurities with our health issues. She is very open so I already knew a bit of her medical issues but I assured her I would have never caught on had she not told me. She then told me her boyfriend's coworker had hyperhidrosis. I remembered another friend had told me her coworker has hyperhidrosis. Where were these people when I was a teenager? I could've used examples of real people within my social network. Sure I will probably never meet these coworkers but THEY'RE REAL. 

I shamefully adore watching Bravo's Eat Drink Love

The more you start chatting the smaller the world gets.  Here I am having real conversations instead of judging my life against stupid reality TV shows. Imagine that. 

More chatting less TV. Don't be fooled into thinking I will give up TV completely. I'm currently binge watching Breaking Bad on Netflix (OMG that show makes me so tense).